It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
