Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
this will be a night to untag.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Randomize
