So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
