you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize