so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize
