Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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