He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize