haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
