In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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