fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
