I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I will be naked everywhere
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
