What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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