also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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