Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize