ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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