How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
