NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
