we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
