Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
