ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Randomize