Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
