A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
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