Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
