I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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