Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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