And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps bees of course he's weird
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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