Do you still have your period?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Randomize
