My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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