you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
