Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
A bitchslap is in order.
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