I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
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