i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Randomize
