She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
