oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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