I think I am morally bankrupt
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
