The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
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