i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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