she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
