U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
