she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
