"it" just moved
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Randomize
