You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
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