How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
