He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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