mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
