you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
