Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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