So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Im part way to drunk.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
