yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize