Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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