If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
